Mrs. Beasley packed her purse

fearing things would just get worse:

 

gloves and flippers, skates and socks

lotion for the chicken pox

 

rain umbrella, steaks and fries

drops and goggles for her eyes

 

cell phone, blanket, tire jack

a map so she could make it back

 

pound of breath mints, whistle, mace

sun-screen to protect her face

 

shovel, ladder, power bar

a plastic cover for the car

 

a barbecue, a four-inch book

a frying pan so she could cook

 

a deck of cards, a game of chess

her handbag really was a mess,

 

prepared for all she could foresee

any eventuality

 

but worse it got, and most unfunny -

she left her credit cards and money!

 

 

This poem first appeared in the anthology, The Bad Hair Day Book: Pick Me Ups for When Life

Gets Tangled (Thomas Nelson, 2006).

Used here with the author's permission.